Retired Jokes

There are certain jokes that are used so, so, so much. In fact, they're so old, it astounds me that people continue to find them funny. Not only that, they're used everywhere, and no one seems to comment on how old they are. Well, I want you all, YES, all of you, to start a vigalante birgade against these jokes. Here is my list of them...

1) "You don't have to be faster than the bear, just faster than the other guy running from the bear."

2) "Don't eat the yellow snow." Editor's note: This was never funny, so you deserve to be flogged for using it anyway. --NJM

3) "Before you insult someone, first walk a mile in their shoes. Then, when you insult them, you're a mile away. And you have their shoes."

Another very important note. I hate it more than anything else when I see the jokes above altered slightly because people think they can make them funnier. Watch.

"you dont have to be faster than the bear just faster than the slowest guy running from the bear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" = less funny.

Please feel free to add to my list! You know they're out there.

Oh, last thing. DON'T YOU DARE KILL ANY JACK HANDEY JOKES. He's my hero. I love him. In fact, I'd love him more, but he'd press charges.